Brightlyme i know i wasted 90 mins of my life.

Aubrey Hackett While it is a pity that the story wasn't told with more visual finesse, this is trivial compared to our real-world problems. It takes a good movie to put that into perspective.

Ava-Grace Willis Story: It's very simple but honestly that is fine.

Sanjeev Waters A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

videorama-759-859391 Some wack job out there is killing Santa's, so it's up to good ol' Scotland Yard to catch this maniac, who's killing with consistency, one such incident, blowing a Santa away, with a barrel to the open mouth way. This is a shoddy made film, slapdash, with nothing going for it, except a high Santa count. This thriller, throws in a few suspects, where it has us highly believe it could be the chief, (Piece's killer, Edward Purdom) and it does that, especially if you've seen Pieces. The blood is so fake (check out the sex booth scene), and some of the acting is laughable. White Fire's Belinda Mayne who's father was a victim, has a warm spot for Purdom, and it was interesting to see how far this would go, or hope it would go. Suspect, journalist hound, Alan Lake, is again a pleasure to watch. This is a bad movie, which incidentally came out, virtually the same time as Silent Night Deadly Night, which is fine film making, when compared to this mess, which I admit it's explosive ending one would say, was impressively unexpected, as is none of the rest of this film. An eerie touch here, is hearing the tune, Silent Night Holy Night, played on an accordian, in bits, throughout. What a mess, with endless bodies, a nude bloodied one, the camera favors up close, for our visual enjoyment.

Dagon Coincidentally, I was going to review this UK-based, Christmas-themed Slasher as part of my final review anyway but since the holidays are right around the corner, it couldn't have come at a better time. Perhaps you've heard mention of '84's Silent Night, Deadly Night and 1980's Christmas Evil (aka You Better Watch Out). Both can be considered films within the sub-genre as well, especially the former, but they aren't what I consider obscure…at least not to the standards of this particular review series. In terms of top-tiered material, Black Christmas is still the reigning champ; the original from 1974 of course, although the remake was done remarkably well.The film opens with scenes depicting a costume party several days before Christmas. Kate's father, dressed as Santa Claus, makes his appearance on stage and is quickly assassinated by someone from the crowd. The police are quick to investigate; particularly Inspector Ian Harris (Edmund Purdom, also the director). The blame is gradually shifted upon Kate's boyfriend Cliff. Any male participant found representing good ol' St. Nick is taken out in brutal fashion. Is Christmas doomed?I found it difficult to reasonably describe the film's premise on account of how humorous and well…stupid, it is. During the opening segments, while the credits appeared on screen, I had a glimmer of hope – could THIS be the Christmas-themed horror movie of the past so aggressively sought after by enthusiasts? After the high of my inner pep-talk wore off I was faced with the grim reality of a mess-ridden film. It's been documented that the finished product was the result of a few directorial changes in the crew's lineup. Hideous cut-jobs are littered throughout and it'd be a chore to find a lengthy segment that does not have this issue. Probably the most prominent example of such shortcomings pertains to the death sequences – you may as well forget any use of subtlety and smooth transitional work. The killings begin and end so abruptly; they merely drop them on you like a giant anvil. Not to mention that they occur so rapidly and involve characters that share no screen time prior to their demise. Obviously the highlight in a moment like this is the gore factor but even that is severely lacking.I may as well spell things out for you as to familiarize yourself with the players involved in Don't Open Till Christmas…E-M-B-A-R-R-A-S-I-N-G. Outside of Edmund Purdom (who's been in a few horror movies, and his acting merits far outweigh his brief directorial work), the inflections used, or rather, not used, result in a very underwhelming performance. They manage to be so unconvincing in their deliveries that, collectively, they'd fail miserably at selling bottles of oxygen in a space vacuum. In your typical Hey-What's-Going-On-Here? one can always expect a few distractions; characters thrown into the mix that make the audience think twice of who the killer is. In this case, a reporter is introduced, unfurling a red flag to allow the guessing games to begin among the audience. I wouldn't worry about twists, tricks, or cerebral traps because the red herring in this film is so fat you may just want to throw it in the oven.At the height of the film's conclusion, the motive of the killer is finally revealed, in what turns out to be the DUMBEST of reasons to go on a murderous spree. I'm not even sure it makes logical sense. It's zany and unintentionally hilarious which probably stands as the most insulting thing you could do as a film producer. Don't Open Till Christmas is one cookie that you shouldn't leave out for Santa; when it's all said and done, I'm sure you'll agree that not only does it have nothing to do with the title, but English accents can't hide poor quality. A native of Britain would probably conclude this review by saying this – "It's rubbish!"

ofumalow The only movie directed by 1950s Hollywood costume hunk turned Euro-exploitation regular Edmund Purdom (at least partly--someone else is credited with directing "additional scenes," probably including the nudity inserts) is a typical 1980s slasher involving disco, sexually active youth, and crudely done gory deaths. I saw it in a budget packet of "Drive-In Movie Classics" that clearly used a 3rd-generation VHS dupe--so I can't fairly judge the film's visual presentation, which seems professional enough. It's odd that at age 60 Purdom suddenly decided to try directing, let alone on such an obviously cheesy project. This being a British film, the performances are competent despite the script's utterly shallow depths--no doubt everyone was conservatory-trained. At times the film feels jumpy, as if scenes (or just violent bits) were coarsely edited out. Even so, one murdered Santa is garroted, then thrust face-first onto a sausage grill. It's a Brit giallo that's not all bad, or as utterly formulaic as many slashers from the era, but it sure isn't inspired.

leonardfranks All right. So the plot's something like this. There's some guy who goes around in random masks and he kills a bunch of people who dress up as Santa Claus. Scotland Yard tries to find him, but they really suck. The daughter of one of the Santa's he kills tries to find him and succeeds, but her deductions don't make any sense. Then everybody dies except for the serial killer. Merry Christmas. I knew this wasn't going to be pretty when they misspelled the name of the film in the opening credits. It's almost entirely made up of scenes that are so short and so all over the place that you really can't make any connection with what's going on. The movie would be really predictable (there's a sinister innocuous secondary character, like in Scooby Doo), except that it's impossible to keep track of everything that's happening, as it's completely random. None of the characters are particularly likable, and the scenes really could be arranged in any order. Nonetheless, some of the Santa deaths were fun. The castration was impressive, as was the guy who apparently soaks himself in gasoline before coming to work every day. Amusing, in a sort of god-awful way.