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A twenty-first-century woman, mother, family helm in her hands; established at work, responsibilities burdening on her too often, plus a deeper dimension, more personal and thoroughly less shareable in which she needs to move following her values, her sense of ethics, her need for answers. The magic touch, the sign of the uniqueness and value of this series created, written, produced and directed by women, is maybe the authenticity of Mary since the first frames and in every single moment of this premiere, her daily routine narrated with priceless candor. Mary is not perfect, in fact quite messy. Mary is not invulnerable and doesn't even try to fight against her weakness. Mary is not emotionless, a whirlwind of feelings simmering far beneath the surface of her apparent control. In this dynamic premiere, serious and funny at one time, viewers are thrown into the middle of this woman's life, while she admirably unravels between her family, daughters and ex -good in his mood and maybe in his intentions, but rather inconclusive, with his compliance as a choice to escape responsibilities – and work, in fact, the works.Engaged in E.R. we see her sharing her boss' responsibilities simply because, as often happens, "you're so much better than I am…"But it's the other job the one that unveils her involved body and soul, the support work, shared with Des, incomparable, the amazing Richard Short, in helping terminal patients to choose to die. Quiet and discreet as she is, we must bow to the amazing Tara Armstrong for her delicate touch in picking up a subject as thorny, exploring it in substance, no space left to any hint of controversy, simply highlighting Mary's deep moral involvement.As though much of the routine was something to be done and what she does with Des something she cares to do, the intensity of her emotional involvement properly tells us about something that's inside out justified, rather than seen as a cold business.Suddenly the effort to get out of the chaotic routine, always showing an excellent mastery (kudos to Dhavernas for her astonishing delivery ), reveals the passionate fragility of this woman, with all her need to get lost and to vanish into something to find herself back, to know and to feel that she is still alive, mind and emotions trapped in the Mary that everyone expects, but still hers, still throbbing. Knocking on Joel's door, approaching him on that couch, and breaking in a blow all the rules of common sense and of protocols so meticulously prepared as walls, erected to protect her vulnerability, respond to an impulse much more emotional than torrid We all are Mary when Joel's apartment door opens, we all are bewildered as she is, swallowing empty because Joel has the appearance, the look, the voice of Jay Ryan. If they had cast him just for this "power", they would have hit the target, totally.However, it's Jay Ryan, indeed.Immediately after that priceless gift, all natural and physical, to arouse lustful thoughts, the powerful compelling intensity of his emotional performance takes over and prevails, and you totally forget the appearance, em-pathetically captured, bewitched by an emotional universe that strongly reveals the complexity and the depth of character's personality. Even about Joel we know nothing, except that he is torn.Torn, fragile, tormented, both in front of the mirror than sitting with Mary and Des, his eyes wandering restlessly to not leave open too many windows, then suddenly direct, to inspect others' cracks to look for a control he knows he has no more but which is accustomed to manage.There's too much, in Joel, because Mary did not choose to return.Too much fair, charming and tender in that wound vulnerability, in that desperate as proud request for help.Too much wrong and perverse, at the same time comfortable and reassuring, in that nonsense, irrational attraction, in that subliminal appeal to the zeroing of all defenses.We get Mary, totally.For a few moments, in the arms of Joel, in the nothing of passion, all makes sense.She is alive.So we're to believe and to understand Joel's hesitation too, so much as we think we understand his abrupt reaction to Mary's words about his disease, as much as Mary seems to get him too.We believe we have seen the painful side of Joel's vulnerability, the conflict between what you would like and what it is, sadly. But Joel holds for us the bitterest of the surprises.Conflict, hesitation, uncertainty, we took quite rightly, but his reasons are all wrong.Joel investigates Mary and Des.Joel allegedly pretending illness, undoubtedly simulates mood.Yet the hesitation, transportation, conflict, sorrow, seem totally real in front of Mary and as she walks away.Joel sees the same Mary that we see, and in spite of his will, he does not come out unscathed.After all how can you come out unscathed and remain insensitive to the impact of so much truth,so much authenticity and honesty?Especially when you're the one who lies.When you have responded to all her truth just with lies and pretense, the awareness can lash, nobody free by a brunt.The honesty of Mary requires Joel to want to be honest, at least in responding to the desire.Realizing it compromises the fictional castle built, the desire to close everything quickly reveals the fear which he cannot avoid to lie in response to Mary's heartbreaking sincerity.The clash between the emotional storms afflicting these two individuals which we have a tempting glimpse of, in this first episode, promises to be almost alone the core of the story, keeping us stuck to our chairs.
