Marketic It's no definitive masterpiece but it's damn close.

Sexyloutak Absolutely the worst movie.

Nicolas Ok... Let's be honest. It cannot be the best movie but is quite enjoyable. The movie has the potential to develop a great plot for future movies

Staci Frederick Blistering performances.

Finfrosk86 This movie simply sucks.Everything about this movie is incredibly bad. Well, not all the camera work, I guess. But the rest. ALL the rest.Nothing makes much sense or seems natural. The jokes range from stupid to extremely stupid, and none are funny at all. The acting (acting?) is bad, and not in a funny way. Every scene seems to be the first take. Some of the scenes are way too long, so that the dialogue comes off as even worse and more unnatural than it could have been, with just a few cuts. The dialogue is atrocious.If this movie was filmed all in one take, with no professional actors, heck, no professionals what so ever, and no script, all improvised, then I would maybe forgive it. The best thing about this stinker is the topless women. But even that comes with a bad aftertaste, as all the women are there just to be sexy. They are pretty hot, but come on. This is clearly from another time, when sexism wasn't much of a subject.Had this movie been entertaining I would have given it a higher score. I don't do the 'so-bad-it's-good'-thing. If a movie is "bad", but still entertains me, I think it's good. But this crappy s**t is not entertaining. It's a total fail.The short run time is the only reason I finished watching it, it's 1 hour 16 minutes. With about 2 minutes of credits. But I had to take some breaks. I think it's one of the worst movies I've seen.

Scott LeBrun Stand up comedian and sometime actor Jackie Vernon had his last movie role in this laugh riot camp horror film. Jackie plays Donald, a construction worker whose wife May (Claire Ginsberg) is trying to get him to eat her experimental dinners. She does this supposedly for his own good, and does it with the assistance of her microwave oven (a real gargantuan artifact). Finally, he can take no more of her nagging and, in a drunken rage, bludgeons her to death with a salt grinder. He comes to realize that he likes the taste of human flesh, so goes out and kills more people to feed his newfound appetites.Written and produced by Craig Muckler and Thomas Singer, and directed by Wayne Berwick, "Microwave Massacre" is a pretty tasty morsel when it comes to horror comedy. It's full of utter ridiculousness, and absurd dialogue, not to mention some deliciously tacky gore effects and one utterly priceless severed head. The amusingly deadpan Vernon alternates between being sincere, and letting the audience in on the joke by breaking the fourth wall. His interactions with victims and other characters are a joy to behold. We have a hooker named Dee Dee Dee (Lou Ann Webber), a psychiatrist (John Harmon, who'd acted for director Berwicks' father Irvin in things like "The Monster of Piedras Blancas" and "Malibu High"), a doctor with the childish moniker of Von Der Fool (Ed Thomas), a hottie foreigner (Anna Marlowe) who makes a living dancing in a chicken costume, Donalds' fellow construction workers Roosevelt (Loren Schein) and Philip (Al Troupe), and Sam (Phil De Carlo), a grumpy bartender who doesn't want to hear his patrons' sob stories. Ginsberg is perfect as the kind of nagging wife that would drive any husband mad.This movie keeps coming up with enough wacky and irreverent shtick to sustain it through a very reasonable one hour 17 minutes run time. Just don't expect to see the title appliance come into play all THAT often while it plays out.Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm so hungry I could eat a whore.Seven out of 10.

thesar-2 Man, I wish I had a time machine to go back to the early 80s when anyone with twenty-five bucks and five hours to kill can make a movie.There's no real reason to see this, or even review this…so if this takes me more than another few minutes, I'll cut it off mid-stream. Basically, I saw the VHS box at the local video store as a kid and wasn't allowed to see horror/R-rated movies. I'm trying to fill in all the gaps as an adult…but, maybe my parents were right.This microwave "movie" was made just to capitalize on the microwave boom around the early 80s – I remember when we got our first one, of course it was much smaller than the 10'x10' one featured in this "film." The "movie" has almost nothing to do with the microwave and more about a guy fed up with his wife's cooking so he kills her, eats her and then does the same to more women. This "project" is supposed to be a sex-romp comedy first with some horror thrown in. Admittedly, one gag – the TV episode – worked and I did laugh. The rest, not so much.Luckily, I found this free on Youtube, and even that price was too high. Someone please report it for copyright infringement so no one else has to suffer.***Final thoughts: Day 20 Movie in the Can! I'm watching a NEW-2-ME horror movie every day of October 2016 and this one makes me doubt watching any more "new-2-me" horror movies. Fortunately, it's only 76 minutes, but you'll feel every bit of those.

rooee Described by its original DVD distributor as "The Worst Horror Movie of All Time", this 1983 black comedy doesn't quite live up to that promise, but it's a close thing. The painted cover art is fantastic, and typically unrepresentative of the lousy content of the film.Donald (Jackie Vernon) is a depressed, disillusioned construction worker who returns each evening to his frumpy, nagging wife, May (Claire Ginsberg). She feels she doesn't get the gratitude she deserves for "slaving away" at her new microwave all day.One night Donald snaps and murders May. Naturally, the only way he can destroy the evidence is by cooking and eating her. He gets a taste for it (excuse the pun) and thus begins enticing ladies of the night back to his suburban home. He cooks them and feeds them to his insatiable, ignorant co-workers. Donald is free and he's impressing his new best buddies. What can possibly stop his campaign of cannibalism? Vernon was a stand-up with a distinctive deadpan style, which is entirely incongruous with the farcical events of this story. Combined with the film's weirdly languid pace and Leif Horvath's eerie electronic score, it's quite an unsettling experience – although this is mostly due to it being an outright tonal disaster, rather than any controlled sense of atmosphere.With the humour and delivery of a 70s sketch show, it's a movie badly in need of canned laughter, if only to inform us of when we're supposed to laugh. Genuine humour comes in the briefest of snatches: Donald's encounter with Dr Van der Fool (Ed Thomas), who doesn't know which side the heart is on; or the scene where May's sister stops by and Donald has to prop May's disembodied head in the bed to pretend she's still alive ("She looks awful pale...").It's a movie of a mercifully bygone era in which all the women are nags or sluts, although this is par for the course in trash horror of the time. What the flesh sandwich lacks is a juicy layer of satire. Given that the microwave was just becoming a household essential in the 80s, promising the death of the conventional cooker, this has to go down as an opportunity missed – we get none of the consumerist satire of The Stuff, nor the grotesque farce of the more enjoyably outrageous Street Trash.Microwave Massacre just about claws its way into the midnight movie slot through a certain uniqueness and, frankly, its brevity (it comes in at around 75 minutes). But it's more of a freak-out than a fun time.