2hotFeature one of my absolute favorites!

Pacionsbo Absolutely Fantastic

FirstWitch A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

Francene Odetta It's simply great fun, a winsome film and an occasionally over-the-top luxury fantasy that never flags.

qmtv I don't believe the film makers were trying to make a comedy. But it is. First time I tried to watch this, I shut if off after 20 minutes, and told myself this is really bad, I can't watch anymore. Then months later I sat through it and even knowing how bad it was, I made it to the end, shaking my head at how incredibly bad it was, the worst, and cracked up laughing throughout. The best part about the movie is the lighting. The acting/actions/accents, music, plot, effects, directing whatever, all garbage.I have read all the reviews. And that was a bonus of laughter. There has not been a movie made that is so bad that you will laugh throughout. It is complete crap wrapped in a gift basket.Watch the move, read the reviews. You cannot get this kind of humor/energy from anywhere else. This is The Best Comedy Worst Movie of All Time

Leofwine_draca There are bad films, there are really bad films, and then there's LASER MISSION. Okay, so maybe LASER MISSION isn't quite as bad as all that – the fact that it's unintentionally funny all the way through means that it's got a surprisingly high level of entertainment – but it certainly marks the nadir of Brandon Lee's brief career. It's an amateur night offering, shot on the cheap and with awful editing on what looks like the lowest grade film stock imaginable. This so-called "movie" was the result of a collaboration between the USA and Germany, and add location shooting in South Africa to the international brew. You may think that the resultant wealth of input would have led to a halfway decent film, but it's a case of "too many crooks spoil the broth" in this instance.The title makes it sound like some sci-fi STAR WARS rip-off but in fact this is a run-of-the-mill spy thriller, with Brandon Lee's mercenary hero (who has his own theme tune in the form of 'mercenary man') battling evil Germans and Russians (one of whom is named 'Colonel Kalashnikov', believe it or not) for possession of a huge diamond that looks like it's made out of glass. The film basically involves Lee being captured, escaping, shooting lots of bad guys in bloodless displays of action, and engaging in lots of car chases with clapped-out motors. Ernest Borgnine's also on hand in an extraneous role as a scientist, and it's kind of fun seeing him run round with a rifle, shooting people – reminded me of THE WILD BUNCH made some 21 years before this. But it's also kind of sad.There's no denying that Lee was an athletic actor and there's some fun to be had from watching him dropkick the bad guys. But his acting is a little flimsy here, and his attempts at comedy are pretty poor. But compared to his love interest, played by Debi Monahan, he's an Oscar winner. The dialogue between these two is groan-inducing and Monahan is the typical blonde bimbo in low cut attire, although to be fair she does take more of a role in the action than is usual. As for the villains, we have good old Werner Pochath, typecast as the villainous German as usual, and Graham Clarke as the ineffectual Russian.The story is dotted with awful 'comic relief' some of it coming from a pair of Cuban soldiers – one man, one woman – who make the worst double act I've seen in a while. There's no denying the overacting in this film. The UK DVD is amusingly rated PG, although the last time I checked, the BBFC guidelines didn't allow f-words, headbutting and back-breaking in PG rated films. Really, this film is awful. From the cheesy one-liners to the scenes which reference COMMANDO, you don't get much worse – which is why this sort of stuff is just up my street. Best of all are the numerous silly/unbelievable things going on, from our heroine crossing the desert in high heels to our hero getting shot in the stomach and shrugging off the wound! The back of the box doesn't even relate to the real plot and why title a film LASER MISSION if you're not going to put any lasers in it? Why not just call it DIAMOND MISSION or something? If you like bad movies, you're in for a treat with the ultra-poor LASER MISSION.

Ziggo Doesn't anyone else wonder how in the hell they DROVE ACROSS THE Atlantic OCEAN?! Funniest thing I ever learned from a movie: Apparently the border of Cuba is not the Atlantic Ocean, but a mostly desert covered country of Africa (Namibia, maybe?). Holy God. The main girls voice was just horrible, she was so unattractive too...ick. Great how they didn't get any sweat stains while trekking through the desert for days on end, and how they kept running across random henchmen who were just wandering around there too. Made me laugh so hard I couldn't breathe. Oh, and who could forget the ninja jumping out of NO WHERE and being dispatched in like 3 seconds flat? They just had to add the ninja. Best disgustingly awful movie ever, terrible in an awesomely horrible way. If you're into awesomely-bad stuff, check it out.

manicgecko Brandon Lee actually made it to superstardom? Me thinks perhaps the only reason is that he was killed during the Crow. Laser Mission all but proves that there is no talent. Everybody in previous posts are raving about Lee's wit and one-liners - me I played "what stupid thing is the writer going to have Lee say next", and watch Lee blow any sense of timing, delivery, or style. Like Spiderman with a concussion he blows perfect chances to hit lame oneliners and they plop out like a lead fart. Saying that I actually liked the Boris and Natasha knockoffs who were supposed to be some Cuban/Russian/African soldiers of fortune, and really wished there were more shots of them.Unfortunately Lee was not the only rotten part of the movie. Borgnine must have had sunstroke to sign on, and Monihan - though giving us a couple nice shots of her flesh covered pasties, and her on again off again bra, couldn't act her way out of a tele-evangelists healing stage. And isn't Lee supposed to have been some sort of Kung Fu master? The martial arts in this flop consisted of synchronized falling down and explosions in the distance.The ending supposedly tied everything together after killing the psychotic bad guy about a jillion times. He deserved it for uncuffing Lee, me I would have placed a slug between Lee's eyes the first chance I got and saved the world the last 30 minutes of this flop.My suggestion - stick with watching Daddy Lee, and let Brandon's movies grow mildew in the dungeon's of the rankings.