Tetrady
not as good as all the hype
Mabel Munoz
Just intense enough to provide a much-needed diversion, just lightweight enough to make you forget about it soon after it’s over. It’s not exactly “good,” per se, but it does what it sets out to do in terms of putting us on edge, which makes it … successful?
Usamah Harvey
The film's masterful storytelling did its job. The message was clear. No need to overdo.
Janis
One of the most extraordinary films you will see this year. Take that as you want.
UnderworldRocks
Excellent! Just excellent!I didn't expect it to be this good.There have been so many vampire movies. There have been so many movie or TV adaptations of Bram Stoker's novel. The source material has been explored in all angles and there's nothing left to do, right? I thought so. And I was wrong.How to tell a Dracula story in a way that is fresh and interesting? This movie is the answer!Combining a vampire story with the SEVEN SINS and creepy rituals, brilliant!I would also like to mention that the climax of the movie was surprisingly intriguing. At first I thought that the ending would be a cliché, with Dominic choosing love for his girlfriend over everything else, jeopardising the ritual, and saving the day. And then, a moment later, he plunged the dagger into his girlfriend's heart. Marvellous twist!10 out of 10! Brilliant!
boocwirm-1
Ridiculous movie, gets a "3" only because the production values are fairly good, considering the budget. But the script and direction are just terrible. Films like this follow a classic formula: a group of good-looking teenagers (typically including a sexy pair, an innocent pair, a stoner or two, and a misfit -in this case a "fat kid") find themselves trapped in a supernatural place (a castle, a cabin in the woods, a cavern, a forest)and mostly perish while trying to escape. If it's done well and with intelligence it's a good movie; done poorly the formula can produce a laughable stinker. IMPALER unfortunately falls in the latter category. Some of the objectionable points include 1) a story that makes no sense whatsoever and isn't even internally consistent: if the kids are being selected as sacrificial victims because of their individual sins- the film is quite explicit that the sexy girl is chosen for being promiscuous and the fat kid for being a glutton- then why are the good kids selected for sacrifice too? 2) laughable characterization, e.g. the fat kid -played by an actor who is actually in fairly good shape- cannot resist eating all the food he can find, even a meal he stumbles across in a dusty, vermin-infested old room. His obsession with stuffing his face is his only characteristic. Likewise the greedy kid can think only of money, etcetera, etcetera... 3) stupid details. The girls know they will be hiking for miles through a Romanian forest yet they strap high heels on their feet. There's a scene in which the good kid -or is it Vlad?- is running down the road accompanied by what I guess is a pair of wolves. It's supposed to be scary but it looks all the world like a college kid out jogging with two lovable puppies. And if Dom is supposed to be a descendant or reincarnation of Vlad -which is what I got out of it- then why did the other kid have the dream that lured them to Transylvania in the first place? Why is the Book of the Dragon written in English at the end? 4) undeveloped horror elements. The film doesn't bother to explain just who exactly are the creatures who kill the fat kid, or who are the shadowy figures often seen flitting around in the background. Where did the succubi who kill the sexy girl come from? And why exactly would Satan release Vlad from hell for killing the kids anyway? 5) Unfulfilled promises. Dracula doesn't appear as the traditional Dracula even though his name is in the title. Prince Vlad of Wallachia appears just once or twice, briefly. Nobody gets impaled in a movie called the Impaler. Two-thirds of the way through the film I was sitting there asking when something -anything- was going to happen. And it didn't get much better from there. With all the talent in the industry you'd think they could get a script doctor to add some clever dialogue or a few interesting plot points before releasing a film like this. At the very least the special effects and gore should be memorable. But The Impaler comes up short on all counts.
angiris
The film is absolutely dreadful. I must be fair though and point out that the beginning had me going for some time. The atmosphere, the storytelling... but all in all it turns into this poor excuse lame teen flick where nobody takes anything seriously other than to get it on with one another... Its an uber stereotypical cliché piece of garbage. The film actually had potential but the execution of this is so poorly done that whatever hope I had for this evaporated after about 30-40 minutes. I had actually looked forward to this. The Impaler. I thought like..YES! Finally! A historically based film on Vlad Tepes himself. Boy was I wrong!!!And honestly!! Whats up with all that witchcraft and devil worship... VLAD NEVER SOLD HIS SOUL TO THE DEVIL!!! Not even literary Dracula did that!!! He turned against GOD!!! and was punished for doing so. Well the Bram Stoker kind anyway... God....that ending too...so anti climactic... I swear to god the "Oh my god was it all a dream...did I just imagine all the killing and all the evil I committed??" factor is just the icing on top of a huge c r a p cake. Not joking. We get this cliché move that just out of nowhere forces us to question EVERYTHING we've just seen...only to see Vlad..in the shape of some young dude 500 years after his death...LOOKING EXACTLY LIKE HIM....Yea!! not kidding... die and awaken as....you know it.....no one other than... Dracula HIMSELF!! What the F U C K!!!! Dereck Hochenbrough... If Vlad Tepes were alive today..I have not a shred of doubt that he would have you impaled for creating such a poor piece of garbage and associate it with him... Please don't ever touch this horror genre EVER AGAIN!! Ohh yea... And Dereck...You can take your fake reviews..your fake accounts and their fake ratings that resulted in this lousy piece of s h i t got a freaking 6-7 out of 10 and SHOVE THEM RIGHT WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE! How DARE YOU TRY TO SCAM US LIKE THIS!! How ignorant do you think we are! False advertising...thats not only illegal but its also SOOOOOO LOOOOOW!!!!!! Anyone remember the Limbo Song?.... How low....can you go.? And honestly....Why is this film even called the Impaler..when there is like NOT A SINGLE HUMAN BEING IN THE FILM BEING IMPALED.. There one of the teens who end up getting a pipe of something forced through their gut... BUT HONESTLY!! THAT DOESN*T QUALIFY WHATSOEVER!! Get a grip and go read a history book....or simply go read freaking wikipedia or something... What...was it impossible for you to like stage Dracula returning and impaling the other girls and dudes in the film...that would've been immediately better...at least entertaining horror-wise..God... This is just another disgrace to the Dracula Franchise. Just another slap to the face to Dracula and all his fans... STOP EXPLOITING THIS TITLE!!!! WE LIKE IT!! MAKE SOMETHING PROPER!!
David cc
Ridiculously terrible movie. Horrible, obnoxious acting. Not scary at all. Extremely predictable. These ratings must have been written by the director, as no man in his right mind would enjoy this. I'm 99.9% positive the director created a number of fake accounts to skew the ratings. I wouldn't be so mad if I didn't pay $7.99 on on demand for this piece of junk. I feel like I was scammed, as there are no refunds for bad on demand movies. The director is 25 years old or something... And it shows. Bad story, bad acting, bad directing, and worst of all bad business. And I wouldn't have written so much about this movie but IMDb has a requirement of there being at least ten lines in a review, so I felt it was a necessary sacrifice in order to save others eight bucks!