Taintlight
Taintlight
| 17 November 2009 (USA)
Taintlight Trailers

The tale of Stella, a young girl who falls in love with an ancient, beautifully-behaired bloodsucker named Edgar. They struggle to stay together in the midst of vampire carnage, but a love triangle bubbles up when a Michael Jackson-loving werewolf named Jack comes forward professing his own love for Stella. Meanwhile, a rival group of "real" vampires led by the evil Razor McBleed are prowling.

Reviews
Blucher One of the worst movies I've ever seen
Console best movie i've ever seen.
Adeel Hail Unshakable, witty and deeply felt, the film will be paying emotional dividends for a long, long time.
Bessie Smyth Great story, amazing characters, superb action, enthralling cinematography. Yes, this is something I am glad I spent money on.
Leofwine_draca TAINTLIGHT is an open spoof of TWILIGHT by the one and only Chris Seaver, a filmmaker with no discernible talent behind or in front of the camera. Seaver is best known for his shot-on-video horror/exploitation fare such as the FILTHY MCNASTY series but this sees him attempting a proper spoof of a popular film.Sadly, it's as infantile and ridiculous as the rest of the director's oeuvre, featuring nothing more than a bunch of non-actors getting into costume and hanging out in the woods. The humour is puerile, the over the top performances are supposed to be funny but really aren't, and the whole thing is nothing more than an appeal to the lowest common denominator.
yohoyohorum If you are looking for a Mel Brooks quality spoof, just keep looking. This is not for you. This movie is filled with toilet humor, bad jokes, and terrible acting. That being said, it does accomplish it objective of spoofing even more terrible source material and I think some of the bad acting is actually a spoof of the cast of Twilight. I found it to be enjoyable if you are capable of overlooking the low budget limitations. It looks like a bunch of buddies shot it on their mom's camcorder, but there were some good laughs in there. If you don't have the patience for unpolished independent films, I would suggest Vampire's Suck instead. I would still much rather watch Taintlight a thousand more times than watch another Twilight movie.
kittyluvsmetal This movie was by far the worst spoof movie I have ever seen. I read the other two reviews and I honestly have no idea what was so funny about this movie. I love spoof movies, they're silly and crack me up with laughter but this movie, Taintlight, was just plain bad. The acting was terrible, the dad's character was funny in a sense that it was all in bad taste, and the story line... just bad. I skipped forward twice in this movie as the terrible scenes just drag on. It honestly was torture to watch and I just couldn't take it. I tried to watch it, I really did, I even waited for the vampires to show up in hopes that maybe it would pick up but it didn't. All the same execrable scenes left much to be desired. I wanted to laugh when I clicked play but all I got was a headache from rolling my eyes so often. Don't watch this movie if you have an intelligent sense of humor. What a waste of my time this movie turned out to be. Stupidity in it's finest form.
Pumpkin_Man This movie is so low budget and stupid that it's actually quite funny. It's basically the hard 'R' rated version of Vampires Suck. Stella moves back to the town of Bonejack Heights and with her incest dad.(The dad is hilarious because he has an incredibly fake mustache and tries to flirt with his daughter) When she goes to school, she meets a vampire named Edgar Mullen who treats her like crap, but she starts a love triangle with him and a Michael Jackson-loving werewolf named Jack. Edgar must protect her from Razor McBleed and his gang. If you like stupid movies, such as Twilight, you'll probably enjoy TAINTLIGHT!!!