SpuffyWeb Sadly Over-hyped

ReaderKenka Let's be realistic.

SeeQuant Blending excellent reporting and strong storytelling, this is a disturbing film truly stranger than fiction

PiraBit if their story seems completely bonkers, almost like a feverish work of fiction, you ain't heard nothing yet.

Python Hyena Firestorm (1998): Dir: Dean Semler / Cast: Howie Long, Suzy Amis, Scott Glenn, William Forsythe, Barry Pepper: Dense project seen dozens of times with all of its dull clichés. Perhaps the title represents the chaos that the heroes will reserve. A bus load of criminals use a firestorm as an opportunity for escape. Howie Long plays a firefighting hero who battles the villains and gets the girl. Predictable outcome sodomized by juvenile action sequences. One idiot decides to use his obsession with wrestling as a counter to Long. The criminals themselves are quite gullible since the leader kills two or three with stupid excuses to match. Director Dean Semler does his best but even the production is nothing spectacular. They could have shot the same thing with a camp fire and action figures. Long is there to appear big and beat up criminals and looking bad doing so. Scott Glenn is wasted in a cardboard role. Suzy Amis plays the dimwit damsel who is caught not once, but twice because she is an airhead. William Forsythe is laughable as the villain who makes nasty remarks but ultimately it is obvious that Long will kick his ass up over his head. He also makes several successful attempts to kill off anyone else who was suppose to be in on his stupid evil plan. One of the most uninteresting films ever made and should be tossed in a campfire and roast marshmallows over its firestorm. Score: 2 / 10

lost-in-limbo Toasty, by-the-numbers b-grade natural disaster action joint which has a stout-hearted Howie Long playing a smoke-jumper that has to tackle firestorms and William Forsythe's gleefully hammy bad guy persona. Forsythe is great and you know you can always expect a show whenever his on screen, as he simply knows how to play devious tyrants. Also along for the heatwave are Scott Glenn and Barry Pepper. Simple-minded writing makes sure that the bubblegum action flows with the blatant heroics coming to the forefront, which is led by Long and Glenn. Hammy dialogues (I can't remember the last time I heard someone be called a butt-munch) are filtered in and the stunt-work can get hot and heavy. Too bad some of the computer effects come off rather lousy, especially during the final climatic scenes. Director Dean Semler (who was cinematographer for such films as "Mad Max 2" and "Razorback") keeps it rugged and heightens it with some stylish shots of the woodland terrain. Disposable, but crackling entertainment.

dragonreborn008 Holy Crap. Howie Long should be promoted to Master Actor. He is so good at expressing his emotions. He should teach a class about emotions at a major college. A major college about human emotions. He is a vortex, that drags all of his surrounding actors and co-workers into his world. The drama in this movie is incredible as well. The whole "firestorm" element pulls you to the edge of your seat and then drops you on your face. I wish I could throw an axe like Howie Long. When the escaped convicts pretended to be Canadian, I wasn't sure whether they were Canadian or American. And when the Bird watcher stated how she had Marine training, I could see how perfect a match those two little love birds were. I really love how the whole plot was summarized in about 10 minutes during the entire feature, this allowed for more Howie Long content. This was an incredible movie. I would recommend it to anyone. Except to pregnant women. This movie has a few side effects such as premature birth, diarrhea, and drilling your eyes out with a jackhammer. I would also recommend Fire Down Below (Steven Seagal). If I could make one wish for anything in the whole world, it would be for Howie Long to restart(or start) his film career.

Theo Robertson !!!! SPOILERS !!!!I couldn`t help noticing that this film was done in a dumb , spectacular Jerry Bruckheimer way . The two heroes save a little girl by throwing a blanket over themselves ! What`s wrong with that ? Nothing , except that the firestorm would have suffocated the trio by using up all the surrounding oxygen . The makers could have been forgiven for including this factual error by doing it the once , but screw up by drawing attention to it a second time during the climax where the hero correctly states the firestorm will use up all the oxygen outside the boat . So much for internal continuity .Maybe I shouldn`t be so harsh because FIRESTORM isn`t a film that`s supposed to make you think . It`s one of those dumb Summer blockbusters that concentrates on spectacle and FX rather than logic , fact or characterisation and I`m slightly surprised that it didn`t do better since I never knew it existed untill I saw it on TV last night . It`s slightly similar to being a cross between TWISTER and CLIFFHANGER and is fairly enjoyable in a dumb blockbuster way , but I would have enjoyed it more if the criminals on the bus got fried . That`s the problem with these type of films - The hero saves everyone